My husband is arriving this Saturday and I haven’t seen him in a month. I’m grateful for the unlimited calls the networks now have or my husband had to endure Php5,000 worth of calls in just a few weeks. I know he  had, when I ran (or flew) off to Makati for a training 4 years before.

Since my first day is all I have to wait, I’ve been frustratingly idle for about 7 days now waiting for his flight to come, save the times when I find a book to read. So what was I up to, to while away the time? I watch sad, romantic movies.

Just 2 days ago, my friends and I watched “And I Love You So.” Yes, it starred the ever gorgeous Derek Ramsey, cute  boy-next-door Sam Milby and a sexier Bea Alonzo.

I LOVED IT! (This is saying something because I almost never watch Filipino romantic movies because I think they’re too cheesy.)

What struck me most was, Lara (Bea Alonzo) loses her husband (Derek Ramsey) 5 months into the marriage and she had a hard time coping up for the loss, if there was really coping up.

And then I thought about my husband. I thought about losing him. If you’ve seen the movie, you’ll know what I mean if i say I would have a harder time than Lara. So, I connected with her. I felt how pain can bring you to the point of giving up, of not living.

I knew. I just knew how she felt. The fear of losing my husband is so great that I think it’s almost tangible.

Then came Cris (Sam Milby), who befriends Lara to help her cope, because he too, had lost a spouse, although a little differently. Cris’ friendship builds into a hungry passion for Lara and seduces her. He wanted to kiss her. To be with her. To love her. That I understood too. It’s the feeling you get for needing that  someone so badly. To be with that someone. Then at one point it consumes you.

I guess you have to be married to genuinely understand the great passion this movie is conveying from the start.

Okay okay, I miss my husband.

So to Rey, I pray that you have a safe trip, especially the weather these days. I don’t wanna lose you.